STRANGE STUPID & FUNNY STUFF!!!

********SMOKIN!
We decided to move sites as there was a better one in a cooler & nicer spot in the Caravan Park we were staying at!
We only had to come down the road a bit, so we didn't do the usual pack up & check up of things, as we would normally, on a big move
We arrived at out lovely shady site & did the usual positioning of the Caravan business, which i have come to absolutely loath!
Anyway Husband was putting up the legs on the van & i was sweeping the slab, all of a sudden i could smell this rubbery smoke smell which i thought was coming from the people at the back of us over their fence!
Next second Mark runs around to the door of the van & says the fridge is on fire where are the keys?
With the keys quickly found & the door opened it was OMG....The van full of this burning smell & ten ton of smoke billowing out of the electrical cupboard, out came the fire extinguisher in the ready!
Straight away everything was turned off & we hoped that there were no flames in between the fridge cavity, we then waited for the smoke to dissipate a bit before pulling apart the switch board, so as to see what the hell had happened!!!
Back outside & Mark noticed the Anderson Lead had been jammed between the brake of the Caravan on the A frame, which caused it to short out!!.....Now this is a major problem!
We just pulled the big Waeco fridge out of the van the other day &  had it serviced as it was playing up!!
Luckily it was not affected, well, so far anyway!!
4 hours later, a trip to town for new wires, a chat on the phone to our electrician back home & Husband is still in there in a mess of wires checking everyone, & rewiring the earth wire that was damaged!!!
Oh Boy!!!......I think we are very very lucky this time & very thankful that we noticed it early & that Mark is so clever & was able to fix it!!
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******* TEETHING PROBLEMS!
Mark brushing his teeth 4,595 times for so so long, with froth & spit growing before my eyes!!
Yucko & Move Over!!.......Lucky I Love You!
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******* WE ARE LOST!
What day is it Mark asks......I say Tuesday, he says no its not,
It is Monday!
After a bit of thought i said
Oh My God i have been thinking it is
Tuesday all day!
Then after a bit more digging in my brain, i said no its not!!!
It IsTuesday
For once i was right!
Just shows how easily you loose track of time, as well as brain cells whilst on holidays!
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********* SO UNCANNY!
After Mark & I set up camp on Fraser Island we decided to go for a walk around & check out the neighbourhood & find the public phone at the Rangers office!
There is no mobile reception up here, & we needed to ring Qld Parks & Wildlife to inform them we had changed camp grounds as they need to know where everyone is.
Anyway, Mark says to me how much do pay phones take these days 20 cents...I said NO
50... Just as i did i looked down & picked one up & said to him, here is one do you want it!
Hahahaha!..How funny at that precise time there it was, a 50 cent piece laying in the sand!
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* JUMPING JACK SHAZZA! 
As i was sitting happily, painting my toe nails at our camp site on Fraser island, what sneaked up ready to lick my feet was a Big Goanna! Shit did i jump!
Mark thought it was very funny!
The poor Goanna slowly made his way in the opposite direction from this mad woman!
As i sat back down & there is another one roaming slowly, they are everywhere, on the hunt for food or better still my toes!
No wonder they are in here they are protected from the dingos, as this area has dingo proof fences around it!

I love too watch them but not at such close range as that!!
Aah! The joys of the bush..........NOT!
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* DUMMIES!!!
We both decided to do a first aid course, as neither of us have ever done one & for my work i need it, plus it will be good to take with us on our travels, you never know whats around the corner!....Anyway off we set this morning to the local paramedics house for our informal course!
We did the cpr on the dummies, then it was time for slings, this time i was the dummy & mark was to tie a sling around my pretend broken arm!
The paramedic said to mark to tie it as close to the fingers as possible, so as he is doing it up on me, i said hey you are suppose to be tying this as close as possible to the fingers!......Mark says of course you have to tie the knot close to the fingers you cant get any further away from them!....OMG I burst into uncontrollable laughter i said my fingers you idiot, not yours!!!!
Now to you this may not seem very funny but seriously it was hilarious, you had to be there!
We laughed so much we were crying!!!!!
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* FIT OF THE FITTEST!!! 
The first day we got into our caravan park in Townsville, Mark met this lady in the shop & started magging to her, well it turned out her & her husband are from the Entrance originally! Mark & her hit it off & chatted for ages!...... Meanwhile i am back in the van wondering what the hell is taking him so long, he only went for milk!
So when he came back to me, he starts telling me about her & her tales!!
Well first thing i ask is............ So what does she look like??
Not that i am jealous or anything! I just need to know these things!!
He says, she is about 60 short chubby & has a flat nose........Oh okay that's good!
That same arvo, she comes by on her way to happy hour & has a chat, the next night
she calls by again, boy can she talk, she never shuts up! 
The whole time too, she is just focused on Husband?
When she left i said to Mark, she fancys you, cause she never talks to me, the whole time she is fixed on you!
Husbands reply.......She has a good looking husband & he is pretty fit!
I said yes but she doesn't want anyone fit or good looking, she wants someone like her!
With that we both burst into laughter!!!!!
Poor Husband!!!!.............I didn't mean you were not fit or anything!
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VERY FISHY I SAY!!!
When we were on the east coast of Australia trying our very hardest to catch fresh fish........Usually to no avail & yes that means we failed!!
We opted or I should say had no choice but to buy fish @ local eateries!
Well none was any good & very disappointing!
How could this be???  
As we live by the ocean & yet we cannot get good sea food!
We just both shook our heads & wondered why?????????
Well.......We are now in Mt Isa which is approximately 1,000 ks from the East Coast & no fish in sight unless they are in the local lake or river..............Which to me is not good as I like deep sea ocean fish!
Anyway guess what??..............We have now tasted & enjoy regularly the best fish since leaving home!!!
There is this fish woman in town who has in her mobile van all this fresh snap frozen red Emperor Yummy Snapper & lots more plus the best prawns I have had for ages!!
Now how bizarre is that!!!
Out here in Mt Isa & they have the best Sea Food we have tasted so far in oz with the exception of our own catch! Yummo!!!!!
I now love going fishing with Husband!!!!!
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******I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS WITH THIS??
I go to the amenities block there is no one in there, 8 toilets free, great in i go.....
Next minute someone comes in, where do they go right beside me??
We go to the movies.....The whole picture theatre is empty, we are the first in.
So we pick our seat, next in is a family baby & all, where do they go?....... Yep you got it! Right behind us, not over to the left or the right, but directly behind us!!!
Next couple come in they plop down directly in front of us, Mark & I just look at each other & shake our heads!......Agrh!!
I don't get it it happens all the time!
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******THOUGHTS!!
As i was pouring my happy hour beverage, i thought to myself, how good Mark & I have been & not yet spilt a drink in our compromised living conditions!
Well it pays not to think....Just as i put my glass on the table, Husband picked up his beer & yep over goes my wine!....What a mess!
So yuck is the smell of spilt grog!
After pulling the lounge apart & cleaning up the mess, as well as stripping off our soaked clothes we settled back down & still we don't know how it happened!
Funny too..... We were sober!
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******MONEY MONEY MONEY!
Just before we left Yeppoon for Mackay, Husband filled the truck with diesel, total cost $145.00 paid by credit card.
Too easy.......NOT!
Anyway a few days later Mark decided to pull out the docket to see how much per litre it cost.
As he double checked the receipt, his credit card was charged $445.00!
We rang the petrol station & as we thought, they were aware of this mistake & will credit it back to the account!
Now that was just a fluke that he found this blunder & lucky also because the petrol station had no record of our details & needed Mark to get in touch with them so as to refund it back!!!!!
That was called the hit of the wrong key trick!
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*******SHARON'S SPRINKLER STUFF UPS!!!
As it is like summer now here in the top end of Qld, & water restrictions are not a problem, which makes me wonder why? As it never rains here!!
Anyway, i have been regularly watering our garden & lawn, this caravan site is huge that we are on & were lucky enough to score, it has a lovely garden & lawn!
So the other afternoon Mark & I were sitting out the back enjoying our happy hour bevy, until it was to time for me to reposition the sprinkler!
OMG.......Stupid Sharon went out & pulled the hose from the back yard to the front yard underneath the caravan!!
PROBLEM........I forgot to turn it off! Hahaha! 
Not funny..... Husband has never jumped so quick or swore so much!.....Oops Sorry!
Well that was OK & we dried the chairs & table & Mark calmed back down!
I really should stop there with my stuff ups cause the next one is a total disaster & just plain stupid!!
Ok here we go!
Yesterday i was sprinkling again, this time i placed it out the front, Mark had the back of the truck open, our waceo fridge is on a fridge slide & it juts out the back of the truck, which makes it easy to get into!  Anyway to cut a long embarrassing story short!
Mark went to get a beer out of the fridge & Holy Heavens to Mercatroid!!!!!!
Well that is not what he yelled out!!!!!!
Water everywhere & worst of all it went in the fridge motor as well as the back of the truck!! It was there for about half an hour & everything was well & truly soaked!
What a wanker i am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I must add that i was sober, which makes it worse!!!
My eyes are so bad!
I thought when i placed it there that it cleared the truck!
To replace this fridge would cost thousands!
We took it out & aired it & thank you Dear Lord it is still going this morning!
I don't think i will be sprinkling for a while i am far too dangerous!!!!!

Lucky Husband still loves me!!! 
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*******SOME PEOPLE!
Mark was at work this particular day, so I decided to get on  the bus & head to town to do what I do best..........Shop!!!
While i was sitting at the bus stop waiting for the bus this Ute pulls up in front of me, at this moment, i am thinking this bloke is strange & what is he doing????
He then gets out of his car & walked around to the back of it & pretended to be checking his spare tyre!
Well that didn't last long, cause the next second, he came over to me & started chatting & asking questions, such as......What are you doing today, Where are you from & a few other stupid questions!
Anyway he then offers me a lift in to town, oh no that's OK I said, I have nothing else to do today, he says, oh me either we could do nothing together!!!  Ewe Yuck i don't think so!
Finally he got the message & said goodbye & left!
Me being the detective, I straight away got out my pen & paper & wrote down his number plate & a description of him & his car!
I rang husband & told him, & he was as concerned as I.
Seriously what is with Some people.........Fancy a 30 odd year old bloke trying to pick up a 51 year old granny off the side of the road? Help!!!
Thank god i haven't seen him again! 
Another day I decided to go for a walk, & as i am strolling along happily enjoying the scenery & sunshine, my eye line wandered to across the road to this couple, i suppose they would be in their 60's. Well next minute she stopped & he walked into someones yard, goes behind the fence & wait for it!
Does a wee!!!!!! I am in shock, YUCK!! 
I turned my head quickly the other away, as I didn't want to make eye contact with them,
as these people looked really strange & very fruity!!!!
Mark wonders why when we go for a walk, I am always looking behind us & surveying the scene!
There are many strange people out there! 
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                               ********POOR MARKS ROCK BOTTOM********

Whilst Husband was walking out to fish off the rocks, he slipped and hit the deck,

or should i say......He Hit Rock Bottom!

Slippery rocks in Qld!

Shoulder stuffed, hip grazed & sore, hope he hasn't broken anything this time!

Clumsy Clutz!...Lucky i am the Nurse!

Hahahaha Poor Husband!

                                                 ******** SICKLY SICK********

      We decided to pick up some seafood when we were leaving

Karumba on our recent visit!

Banana Prawns & some Barramundi....Yummo!

After our purchase we put them in our fridge in the car & off we went headed to the Burke & Wills Road house where we stopped & i hopped in the van & prepared our Prawn Rolls for lunch!

As i was eating my roll i said to mark do you like yours?....He said yeah it's fine why??

Not to me it is seriously turning me off prawns, not that they were off or anything they smelt fine it was just something was a miss with the texture & taste...... Mmmm....Just not right!

Not giving this any more thought, until Mark fell really ill & was vomiting & yep the other end was flowing out also!

I think you get the picture!

He was really really ill!!.......Now with me being the Nurse you will be fine I reassured him..... Poor bugger was in real trouble & with those thoughts etched in his mind, he started feeling 
worse by the minute!

No just joking!

I kept an eye on him the whole day well actually that is no good either as i am
blind as a bat!

Now seriously that is enough being silly! 
I must be serious now as this really is a serious matter!

He kept up his fluids up all day with Gatorade & those sort of energy drinks only to be rejected by his body over & over again!

At one stage I nearly drove him to the hospital!

Well anyway no beer today!......Wow he is really sick!!

Christmas last year he had a really bad bout of food poisoning that lasted for 4 days

I said to him was it like that & he said worse....Oh boy this is not good!

Well let me tell you, it is now 5 days later & he is a bit better but still has gripping pains & those other symptoms persist!

He has just this moment gone off to the local Dr to find out if there is more to it than the Prawns!

Now i must have a stomach made of steel because i never get sick even though they did turn me off prawns for a while & every time i think of them i feel yuck & shudder & my mouth follows by turning into this distasteful looking shape!!

 I must say that he has never got sick in all our years (well 10 that would be) from my cooking!...Touch wood!

Oh boy & Dr's are not cheap either when you are in the middle of No where!

$70 with a refund from medicare of only $30 so much dearer than back home!

Anyway

He has just returned home & it will be off to the pathologist for tests next week! 

Here's hoping every thing is OK with
My Poor Sick Baby!